Do you ever see someone or something and it reminds you of your privilege? I just posted my thoughts on life and then I went online (always a mistake) and I saw pictures of a woman who lives in a place that has burlap as walls and the roof. Imagine being felt such a bad hand at life and a girl with a roof over her head is complaining about bills.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I shouldn’t compare myself to someone else. My situation isn’t the same, our lives aren’t the same, so we’re going to have different problems. I know all that. But that doesn’t stop the guilt, the feeling that I should be more grateful for what I do have. Which is a lot.
I have a supportive family, a few great friends, a drivable car, food in my fridge. And yet I’m sad. To some people, my life is what they’d wish to have but for me, it isn’t enough. And that makes me feel like trash. The most I can do is donate money and that never feels like enough because there’re so many people out there who need help. Sometimes it feels easier to block that out and stay in my bubble but then, I feel more like trash. So what’s the solution?
I could try to be more grateful for what I have but that doesn’t take away the helplessness of not being able to help others. And how can I help others if I can’t even help myself? It’s simple, I can’t. So it turns into a cycle of guilt and helplessness that I can never escape. It isn’t that just a part of being human in these times? It’s as if no one feels like they have power so we passively sit aside while things happen to us.
(Photo by Ismael Sanchez from Pexels)
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